Badonkadonk

Yeah, I got one. I have a badonkadonk. I put the word in huge letters; because, well you know badonkadonks are big. You know the song, go sing right along:
You can look but you can't touch
That honkey tonk badonkadonk
Keepin' perfect rhythm
Make ya wanna swing along
Got it goin' on
Like Donkey Kong
And whoo-wee
Shut my mouth, slap your grandma
There outta be a law
Get the Sheriff on the phone
Lord have mercy, how'd she even get them britches on
That honky tonk badonkadonk


Today, I'm frustrated. I get tired of wearing empire waist dresses or wearing the same pants for like 3 years which seems like FOREVER. Even when I was a size or two smaller, I still had the same problem. It's hard for me to find clothes that fit without having to do a complete alteration. I'm short, as in 5'3". I've got a ghetto booty, and well, let's just say the rest of my body doesn't go with this large rear. I'd say I'm built alot like Kim Kardashian. I was in Vineyard Vines today trying on the Skylark dress and to no avail, too tight in the rear. Argh, silk and satin are not my friends. And, I'm not trying to gain sympathy compliments by any means. Tis true about my hiney, a couple of my girlfriends and I made a trek to Sin City, yup Las Vegas, back in undergrad. Vegas houses one of Madame Toussaud's wax museums. And yes, they happen to have a replica of J.Lo is this museum, and They had me stand next to her to compare, and yes, it's the same size. I guess in all reality I should be thankful. I am, but sometimes, like today, I am not. Days like today I wish I had the normal white girl booty; so, I could fit into some cute clothes. But alas, I digress... There are worse things in this economy than worrying about my precious behind. Speaking of economy, I was trying to stimulate the economy one purchase at a time last night. I had bid on a pair of gold McKims on Ebay, and I was down to the last 15 seconds. Then, wham! A big red X! You have been outbid popped up when I refreshed the screen. NOOOOOOO! Believe me, by the time I scrambled trying to outbid the conniving clock watcher, I had lost:( I was distraught. I have been really wanting some Lilly Pulitzer gold McKims just like I have really been wanting a black pair of Tory Burch Revas, but I just can't justify dropping regular price for them when I need to pay some of my bills off. But I can justify spending oh say about 60 bucks=) Which I bid 50 dollars + 10 dollars shipping=60 buckaroos. I got outbid my $3.05. Seriously, a tear ran down my cheek. I really really wanted them. I contacted the seller to ask if they would be listing anymore size 8s. The ever so kind person said, "Yes, I will be listing another size 8 in a couple of days." Yessssssssssssssssssssssss! And away to bed, I went. To much surprise, I checked my Ebay this morning and found a message from the seller giving me a second chance offer. They sold me a pair for 50 buckaroos + 10 buckaroos shipping= 60 burning a hole in pocket dollars. Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!