Lent-Give up and Give

While going through my reader today, one of the posts mentioned this *forgive me! i forget which one*: When you fail to follow through with your new year's resolution, you let yourself down. When you fail to follow through with your Lenten promise, you let God down. I have really struggled with what I wanted to do this year. In fact, I accidentally ate meat this past Friday. I was really, really disappointed with myself. For those of you who are new readers, I became Catholic two years ago. Therefore, I haven't been doing this my whole my life. I think God would understand my slip up. I went back and forth on what to do, and whilst I'm a few days late, it's better late than never. I decide to give up something and give something this year.

I decided to give up my late night ritual of my twitter feed and gossip mags. I am going to read my Catechism book nightly to understand more about the faith I have chosen for myself. I feel that my RCIA class was great, but it didn't go as in depth as I would have liked to. 


The something I am giving this year would be a small portion of my time to my grandmother. When I mean time, I mean visits to my grandmother's grave. I spent every weekend with my grandmother til I turned the age of 14. At 14, my friends started making fun of me, and I thought it was so "uncool" to spend the weekends with her anymore. If only I'd known then what I know now. I didn't have a bajillion years left to spend with her. Two years later, she died. I visited her grave once when my parents made me go with them after she had passed. I miss her every day. I would give anything to be able to crawl up in her lap and for her to kiss my forehead and for her to make me some of her strawberry cake. I have never been able to come to terms with her death, and I think it's time for me to give some of my time to her. I hope she misses me too...