Dear Wonderful Everything I ever could have imagined for myself LC,
Please take your head out of the chemicals you are using to test that #$^% water for that %&*@ aquarium you are putting together and listen to the words that are coming out of my mouth. Yes, I understand it is important that the water cycles are in chemical balance to replicate the saltwater in the lovely ocean in order to sustain life i.e. Nemo fish without a fish cemetery amidst the surface of our water for your lovely, beautiful girlfriend, but really listen to me instead of hearing "Blah blah blah ba blah ba baba blah blahbablahbablah" [insert the voice of Charlie Brown's teacher here]. I understand that our table must look like a makeshift CSI lab with all your little glass test tubes and bottles of chemicals as I watch you meticulously and methodically mix these said chemicals which resemble water with a dab of food coloring to me to see if the colors change in order to sustain such a Nemo life. However, when speaking to you, laying out at MY pool on Saturday and laying out at MY FRIEND's pool on Sunday mean exactly just that. I will be home on Saturday afternoon and NOT home on Sunday.
Sincerely, Your loving, doting, beautiful girlfriend should be your fiance if you'd hurry up and get a move on it,
Saturday's conversation as follows:
LC-So, what are you doing today?
Beautiful Belle- Laying out before the wedding. What are you going to do today?
LC-Going to go get mulch and go to my parents house
[Yes, people I have a lovely man. Not only is he ridiculously intelligent hence the law degree, he also has two other degrees. Bachelor's in Marine Biology and a Master's in Biology, and yes he discovered a new species of fish for his dissertation, and yes he knows tons about gardening and landscaping and can build anything possible. I truly am VERY lucky. Okay, enough self promoting about my wonderful bf.]
Beautiful Belle (okay I'm cutting the beautiful. I'm exhausted and trying to motivate myself by talking of my exquisite beauty to which I'm sure my readers are like OMG cut the beautiful crap already)-Have fun.
LC- make sure you start getting ready by 3:45. We are leaving at 5:15 with or without you.
LC- (text) How is pool?
Belle- (text) Pool is good. Doc J asked if you are coming down here? He says he misses you. We're at my pool. Everyone else is at the "cool" pool.
[FYI, if you live in downtown Memphis, there is a "cool" pool designation by most Islanders where the I wish I was still in college so I'm going to relive my college days by going to this pool and drinking beverages, taking jello shots from the Mayor of Harbor Town, and just getting inebriated]
LC- (text) Why split?
Belle- (text) Wanted to be at low key pool b/c of wedding and just don't feel like being around that.
LC- (text) That was today?
Which conversation when LC got home was as follows:
No you said you were going to friend's pool today, not tomorrow. That's not what you said.
YES, ladies that's exactly what I said when I got home Friday after work while he was tinkering with his wannabe CSI lab on my kitchen freaking table. I said that I would be at MY pool tomorrow, and friend's pool on Sunday. And, I told him at dinner Friday night as well. But still, I digress. I still got the THAT"S NOT WHAT YOU SAID.
Monday, June 1, 2009
Do you ever get the "That's Not What You Said"?
I do believe this is what happens when I start to tell LC important things i.e. my weekend plans. I think he just tunes me out LOL!!!