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Wednesday, November 6, 2013

Do you ever feel like...

you are living someone else's life? That's how I feel right now. I feel like this isn't MY life. The past few days I've been on autopilot and going through the motions because certainly I should wake up from the nightmare that 2013 has been.

I raise my white flag. 2013, you have defeated me. I'm giving up. #gameover #youwin
#life-1,000,000,000 x infinity  JM-0

1. Not being able to have a baby has been hard. I am thankful for an understanding husband who has not divorced me or left me when I have complete full blown cray cray episodes because I am still mad, sad, and bitter about this. However, I am being hopeful and positive about IVF...

2. My dog had unexpected surgery a couple of weeks ago to remove a growth which I chalked up to just being a skin tag or lesion of sorts which in all reality was a tumor, and I found out on Friday that it is cancerous (mast cell tumor). I couldn't possibly tell you how many times I have bawled like a baby.

3. Yesterday, I found out my mom has breast cancer:/ I'm speechless...

4. My job is super stressful this year. Like as in I just come home and get in bed and shut the world out hoping that I will magically wake up and it will be August 2014.

This is why I've been kinda MIA recently. I really just want to 2013 to end. Which is one reason why I love New Year's Day. You have all these resolutions about the new year, albeit most are never kept, but you get a fresh start, a clean slate. And, that's what I'm hoping 2014 is for me. I hope that God is making me suffer this year in order to make me appreciate all the wonderful things He has in store for me next year. At least that's what I keep telling myself...
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Scentsy

12 comments:

Preppy Pink Crocodile said...

I keep meaning to send you a note to say I am thinking about you and the pup and your momma! I wish I had words that would make it all better for you. Sending bloggy love!

KK

Classy Fab Sarah said...

Oh girl, this is all just too too much. Life can so be super-sucky and unfair.

Hugs.

Heather said...

Hey girlie, sorry to hear all the tough things that have come your way! You are strong, and in time everything will work out for the best!

Dee Stephens said...

Ugh. I felt like this a couple of years ago too.
Hang in there and when it comes to the infertility stuff I would suggest going and talking to a therapist.
It really did wonders for me. So much, that we were able to conceive on our own after TONS of fertility treatments including IVF. My husband even went with me a couple of times to talk to her.

JMc said...

Praying for you and your family. I agree with you though. I think God is just putting a lot on you right now to make your blessings in 2014 that much more precious.

Kathryn said...

Sending hugs and prayers!

Alex M-S @ Commas & Carbs said...

Sending good thoughts and healing vibes. Our golden had to have surgery to have a cancerous tumor removed as well so I can underhand how nerve wracking and horrible those surgeries and that kind of news can be. Will be thinking of you and your family, hoping for recoveries to be had by all. Xo

Alex M-S @ Commas & Carbs said...

Sending good thoughts and healing vibes. Our golden had to have surgery to have a cancerous tumor removed as well so I can underhand how nerve wracking and horrible those surgeries and that kind of news can be. Will be thinking of you and your family, hoping for recoveries to be had by all. Xo

Anonymous said...

{{{hugs}}} You've had a rough go of it lately. Make sure you take care of yourself. Here's to 2014--I have a feeling that it's going to be a good year for you.

Sonya said...

I'm so sorry. Praying for you.

eHa said...

I'm sorry to hear that two of your loved ones have cancer. I'll be sending good thoughts your way.

Sarah said...

So sorry I am just now seeing all of this. I will be praying for you. My mother had cancer too and its so hard! God seems to be testing your strength right now. This too shall pass! Please let me know if you need anything :)

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