Monday, November 14, 2011

Wedding Crasher Gifts

And, I know some of you have asked did I make her leave. No, I didn't. I figured the damage was already done and asking her to leave wouldn't solve the buzz around the room. Also, no telling what craziness *might* have ensued had she been asked to leave. I thought best to just ignore the scrunchy-side pony, white jean, cowl neck, Christmas necklace wearing lady. However, I think I was just ignoring the "white elephant" in the room. I think I just didn't want to "deal" with anything else the night of my wedding. TOO  MUCH STRESS!

So as if crashing the wedding, wasn't cray cray enough...the gifts topped it all. First, I don't know if I really stressed the fact that I have not seen this woman since 5th grade. Btw, that was 20 years ago for me...literally. She wasn't some "significant, life-changing" teacher in my life. We all have those teachers who influence us like no others. I'm not meaning to sound mean, but she wasn't one of those. I just wanted to explain that.

So...the gifts. LC was even scared to open them. I K.I.D. Y.O.U. N.O.T.! She gave us three dvds: Hairspray, Live a Little Love a Little, and Funny Face. I wasn't a musical type kid, nor was I into Elvis. I have NO idea why she gave us those.  She also gave us a small painting. The artist shares the same last name as my teacher, so I assumed it was probably someone in her family. The frame was nice; therefore, at least, we could reuse it. However, that's not the creepy part.

The day after our wedding, I'm unpacking stuff in the bedroom. LC comes racing in and was like I KNOW this card is from your teacher. I, of course, was like how on earth would you know that.  He flips the envelope over and said, "See, it has to be from her. Has to!" Needless to say, after seeing this, I concluded the same.

Yup, that's right...Sealed with a kiss. And it looks like the same bright, coralish pink lipstick she used to wear when I was eleven. If the kiss wasn't weird enough, what fell out of the card was even stranger. I won't post the photo on here because A) I threw it away and B) I can't be that cruel. The photo was of an elderly woman with an oxygen thing on in a hospital bed painting a picture with paintings around her bed. We were both like WTH!!!!! I had no idea who this lady was at all. I open the card, and it is written on from the left side to right side to even the back of the card. It starts out as congratulations, you were always my favorite student to she never completed her masters nor did her mother but her daddy got one from Ole Miss. Then, she mentioned that her mother is 90 and paints pictures. I guess that's the woman in the picture and the artist of our wedding gift, the painting.

I mean y'all, I CANNOT make this ish up for realz. I just had to share. It's almost absurdly funny and would be a shame not to.

Personalized Gifts


sarah said...

creepy to the millionth degree.

atleast you have a super funny story to tell that no one else will be able to top! :)

Carrie said...

This has got to be one of the funniest stories I have ever heard!!!

Jennifer said...

OMG! This is the funniest thing I have ever heard. I am so sorry she showed up to your wedding in the first place though.

Leslie said...

There are no words. That's seriously so crazy!

BriBrooke said...

Oh em gee! That is so weird, but a great story. Sealed with a kiss- ugh!

MarvelousMOM said...

That is beyond creepy!

REBrown said...

I can't believe all of this happened --- what a creeper!

I hope to god she doesn't know where you live because I could totally see her just showing up at your house one day.

Frenchie Finds said...

I'm so sorry this happened to you on your wedding day! As the daughter of a schizophrenic mother...I definitely know mental illness when I see/hear it. Doubt you have anything to "worry" about with this woman, but it still stinks you had that intrusion on your special day. My Mother continuously "looks up" random folks from years and years ago... Its maddening. Very bazaar the people she comes up with.


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